Today, my good people, I was filled. So I'm full. Or so I hope to be. They finally inflated my lap band so it does what its supposed to do. Keep me from feeling so hungry and make me satiated sooner. Alas. Today, I understood what it is to be psychologically hungry.
I'm on liquids for 48 hours, then soft foods for another 48, then solids on Monday. Even though I know I wasn't hungry, couldn't be hungry, I wanted food. This is what I feared. Because what recourse is there? There's no lap band for the brain, my friend. Not yet anyway. So while my physical stomach is full, my psychological tummy is screaming "feed me!" I'm at a loss here, but I will come back to this problem and let you know how I am dealing with it.
The doctor who filled me today in the OR (a little overkill, I think, to be in an Operating Room just to use a needle similar to my insulin needle and fill me with 2.2 mL of Saline...) under the fluoroscope told me I would be 10 lbs lighter when I see him the next time, in a month. Bless his heart! He better be right! And it better be closer to 15 lbs, dammit! I am making such an effort at this, I don't want to fail.
It's so hard for me to imagine losing even 75 lbs, but at 10 lbs a month, by this time next year I could be 120 lbs lighter. I don't want to set myself up for disappointment, so let's just say 75 lbs. I'm happy with 75 lbs off for now.
Thesis Update: I have started. Lo and behold I have about 10 pages written. Only about 60 to go for a bare bones meet-the-requirement-and-graduate thesis. And really, I don't think I'll be winning any awards with this one... Ironically, I am now consumed with all my free time going to writing the thing. I mean, I am DRIVEN. Now, why couldn't this drive have started 3 or 4 months ago?? I could've finished the stupid thing by now!
N update: N is talking so much. Her favorite movie now is happy feet. She says "I want to see Mumble." That's the name of the main penguin. She broke her crib, so we had to get the toddler bed. It was a rough two nights, but now she basically falls asleep by herself IN HER BED after she gets 2 stories read to her. And it takes minutes for her to quiet down versus the HOURS it used to take. AND she has a new trike that I put together for her all by myself! Ahhh, but that's a post in and of itself with photos and everything. You'll see why...
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3 comments:
I'm so excited for you. I'm sure you're going to do well with your health. It's just a matter of finding the right "way" that your body will respond possitively and healthy way.
Was it sas to let go of the crib? I hear of these monumental stages in life, you know, the growing to fast stages and the going from crib to todler bed and taking the bus to their first day of school... Well, I'm hoping it wasn't too bad of an adjustment.
okay well take care, Keila
It was sad because it was the end of an era... I no longer have a baby. Having a baby defined me for the last 2 years. At the same time, I have a person I can talk to and be silly with and will respond back. Every stage brings its own delights!
Can't wait to see the photos!!!! As always I am weeks behind your posts!!!!!I am so happy for everything being going on... and on and on.....
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